Archive for December, 2009

Dec
21

Raise Your Expectations

Posted by: joycebone | Comments (2)

You get what you expect to get. Does the phrase, “Be careful what you wish for” ring a bell? This is the Pygmalion Principle in action. This theory states expectations affect performance. Millionaire Moms is all about helping you raise yours!

The name is derived from a Greek myth in which a sculptor named Pygmalion sculpted a statue of a woman, and fell in love with it. His love was so strong, that it transformed the statue into a real woman. It is this transformative effect resulting from expectations which is the basis of the Pygmalion Principle.

Research in the field of education has supported the theory by demonstrating that students whom the teacher believed were smarter than the rest of the group (when they were actually randomly chosen) performed substantially better than those believed to be “average.” In these experiments, the only difference between the students who performed best and the rest of the group, was the teacher’s expectations. What would you do if you knew you could not fail? Employ this theory to your benefit!

Here’s a funny little example:The attached video is of a guy who wanted to enter a dancing competition. The problem? He can’t dance. Did he let this stop him? No, he transformed his desire to participate into an interesting digital dance and ended up winning.

Let’s live boldly in 2010 and set some creative, mind expanding expectations for ourselves! Share your ideas on the discussion board on our site: http://tinyurl.com/memberdiscussions. Membership is complimentary. We look forward to having you as part of our tribe!

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Dec
07

Insights from a 90 Year Old WWII Vet

Posted by: joycebone | Comments (1)

Maurice “Vic” Duvic, 90, Author of “Forty Missions & Home” and I spoke about his book and long life. Vic, a war hero and member of the greatest generation shared with me what it was like flying 40 war time missions as part of the North African Allied forces, surviving, coming home and becoming the father of 8 children. He was called back to active duty and served 21 months in the Korean War.

He was 22 year old enlisted man stationed in Florida enjoying a fun day at the beach with his buddies when they heard the words that would change their lives, “Pearl Harbor”. A trained pilot he flew 40 wartime missions before it was all over. I inquired if he got butterflies in his stomach before leaving to drop bombs? He said he just hoped he’d come back each time. He also mentioned the pilots used to tease each other before each mission. It was their way of alleviating the stress at hand. The book is written primarily from the diary he kept during those years. It is also full of interesting pictures, comics, newspaper clippings and musings. I found out something new- less than 25% of all enlisted soldiers’ ever saw combat in WWII.

Vic was awarded the Silver Star for his service. On November 6th, he was one of the honorees at the unveiling of a major expansion of the National WWII museum in New Orleans, his home town. In attendance included Brad Pitt and Tom Hanks. Of course, I had to ask him about the day. His reply, “It was mostly political types congratulating each other. It was hot and I got sunburned”. This made me laugh. He also added he appreciated the great lengths the organizers went to in order to create the event. Brad & Tom didn’t seem to impress this old timer very much!

When I asked him about his life he told me he graduated high school at the height of the great depression. I asked how this impacted him? He said he got a job as a stenographer making $90 a month. He figured out if he worked for the government he could make $120 month so he began working in the immigration office. He noticed lots of people coming through. Most people were unaware of the brutality and hardships they had been endured.

We discussed his 59 year long marriage and raising 8 children. He said it was fortunate they both had the same ideas on how to raise children and this saved a lot of trouble. They lived in Mississippi during the height of segregation. They felt they had to do their part and pulled them out of Catholic school to attend various public schools. He noted he traveled a lot and that his wife had to work really hard coordinating carpool for the various schools his children attended.

Vic mentioned his generation having gone through the struggles of the great depression over compensated as parents trying to make sure their children didn’t go through similar hardships. He said the end result was “the 60’s”. The children of the 60’s were indulged and the results were clear to everyone. He didn’t think it did them any favors.

I inquired what was the toughest part of getting older? He said in the past ten years he’s slowed down and can’t do everything he used to enjoy doing. His biggest disappointment is the fact he can’t get out and put up his bird houses up anymore. He was an avid bird watcher. Other than that, he had no complaints.

In closing I asked him for his pearls of wisdom from an adventurous and well lived life. He chuckled and said, “I’m not a philosopher”. I wasn’t going to be deterred that easily as I really wanted to know what a 90 year old war hero who raised eight great kids valued? He ended with the quote found in his book, “It’s not about the destination but the journey.” Well said.

To learn more or order a copy of Vic’s book visit http://www.fortymissionsandhome.com.

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Dec
02

The Art of Negotiating

Posted by: joycebone | Comments (2)

As a middle kid with five brothers and sisters I often said, “That’s not fair!” I quickly learned “fair” rarely exists. It’s all about negotiation.

Here’s one that caught my eye this year. The Washington Nationals paid rookie baseball player Stephen Strasburg a whopping $15.1 million dollars to sign with them. Was it fair that they had to pay that kind of money to a rookie? It doesn’t matter; it’s about what the market will bear. What value can Strasburg bring to the Washington Nationals? They believe based on his stats he was worth every penny.

Strasburg’s signing caught my attention as a business person because of the classic negotiating that went on. His agent knew his stuff. Midnight was the “drop dead” time in which Strasburg would go back into the draft. If the Washington Nationals didn’t get him to sign before then they would lose him to next year’s draft. The agent kept pressure on them to agree to their terms. Strasburg signed with 1 minute & 17 seconds left before midnight-so the deal literally came down to the last minute. Time was on his side and he knew it. It is in those moments of negotiation where the magic happens. When else can a few moments of time be worth so much money?

Here are some basic negotiation tips for you to consider:

• Know what you want before you ask
• Embrace the other person’s agenda
• Respect what they want
• If you think you are an MVP, act & look like one
• Time is either on your side or against you
• Image & perception is reality-always negotiate from a position of strength
(Selling a horse? Act like the Marlboro man. Buying a horse? Act like a poor farmer)
• Negotiating is not a search and destroy mission
• Disarm the opposition (do your homework/research)
• Don’t turn negotiation into conflict
• Push back, don’t attack
• Move from your values to your story
• Frame the debate so they can see your reality: set expectations-
What is going to be the reality?
• Getting your reality to prevail is where the big money is made
• Never spilt the difference-you lose credibility & it’s amateurish
• Practice dealing with fear, “I’m sorry we can’t work things out”
• Put fudge factor in the first offer
• If you are losing get creative
• It’s not about what is fair it’s about market value

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