When we find ourselves in these negative states for an extended period of time we begin to realize, “Wow! This is worse than the actual offense.” It is then that you have a decision to make: Are you going to sink or are you going to swim? If it’s to swim then I suggest you find ways to “lighten up”. Quit complaining. There are alot of people on this planet that have it alot worse than you. Start taking back your control. Do for yourself because no one else will. We come into this world alone. We leave it alone. If we want to live well during our brief time here, we alone are responsible for our attitude.

“There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way” – Wayne Dyer. I believe that.

Here’s an exercise to help you identify the beliefs that you should consider altering:

- Allow yourself the freedom to examine and question
every belief you currently hold about yourself.

- Open your mind to consider that perhaps the beliefs you
currently hold may be false.

- Consider that some of your beliefs might be preventing
you from making the progress you like.

Here’s the exercise (relax and take your time):

- Name the person who makes you the happiest. Think
about why they make you happy.

- Name the thing you enjoy doing the most. Think about
how you feel when you’re doing it.

- Name a place you love to go and go there in your mind.

- Now name a person in your life who causes you sadness
and pain.

- Name what you least like about your job or family.

- Think about a time when someone you care about
humilated you or deeply hurt you.

Once this exercise is complete, you can see the power of the mind. You went from happy to an agitated, angry, possibly depressed state in moments. This powerful mind power can be your ally in identifying negative behaviors in your life that need altering. You know what needs correcting.

In my next post I’ll cover how to control your thoughts if you desire too. The 3 steps are 1) label 2) replace 3) focus forward.

Focus: dig deep, not wide. The key to achieving your objectives is to focus on accomplishing the important tasks. The Pareto Principle (80/20 rule) stating 80% of the results come from 20% of the actions applies. Don’t try to do 3 things at once. Stay on task until you’ve completed your objective.

Flexibility: Many of you reading this are moms. As an
entrepreneur, often times we get knocked off course by a child’s fever, a bad report card (and resulting discussions), an emergency trip to CVS for posterboard. While frustrating at times remember for the majority of us it is the actual reason we became entrepreneurs-we wanted the flexibility to keep family first. Just take a deep breath and let this go. I have learned to re-frame these moments as “rewards”. I am grateful I can stop what I am doing in order to serve my children. My children are why I work so hard in the first place. Don’t ever lose sight of that.

Flexibility also applies to your business model. Most entrepreneurs start out thinking their business will be “X” and usually sooner than later they realize they must adjust to “Y”. Let the customer dictate what you should be selling. Ask them. They will tell you.

Fast: The beauty of being a small business owner is you can adapt quickly. If a competitive advantage becomes apparent, act quickly to capitalize on the opportunity. Don’t get set in your ways in life or in business. Keep an open mind.

Friendly: Are you delighting your customer? Successful people are friendly people. Let’s face it, people do business with people they like. Are you and your staff likable?

Try out these words and see the improved results in your day to day world.

Let’s face it, there is a lot of gum flapping about innovation but truly a miniscule percentage of the population are innovators. How many google founders are running around in the general population?

Why reinvent the wheel? The recipe for success isn’t a grand mystery. It exists all around us. The problem is it comes dressed in work clothes which knocks out the vast majority of the population. The missing ingredient is you-learn to open your eyes to opportunity and then follow up with the necessary work.

What is readily available is modeling. I modeled my way to where I am today and continue to do so. I observe and mimic business models and people that are effective and successful. Earthcare, the NASDAQ traded company I cofounded with revenues reaching $125 million was simply a copy cat of the roll up strategy that had been successfully executed in several industry’s. It was not rocket science. Anyone could have done it but they didn’t, I did. I got off my duff and I made things happen. What could happen in your life if you got inspired and committed?

Pain & Pleasure

Humans are motivated by two things: the avoidance of pain and the experience of pleasure.

New Year’s resolutions start off strong. The committed person is either ready to start avoiding something (e.g. feeling fat or broke) or inspired to experience additional pleasure (e.g. how it will feel to be thin or earning more income).

The first few days are fueled with enthusiasm. However, the reality starts to quickly sink in that this is not a quick fix. It will require the individual change their bad habits for new ones, maybe think harder than they are used to and basically, cause discomfort. It is in these moments where the ordinary are flushed out from the extraordinary. It’s just too hard and they quit.

The extraordinary among us know that pain is temporary but quitting is forever. In the words of Winston Churchill, “Never, ever, ever, ever, ever quit.” Sure, you might experience a setback but that is not quitting. It’s feedback that you might need to come up with additional coping strategies. A setback doesn’t require that you quit your objective. Dust yourself off and get back to it.

Remember what it is you are fighting for. Go back to your “why”. It is the one thing that will inspire you to suck it up and move forward towards the dream life just waiting for you to reach them. Don’t back off of your goals. Write down 10 reasons why you will do whatever it takes to make my vision a reality. Do this before you waiver so it can act as your life jacket during the low moments. Dig deep my friend! It will be worth it in the long run.

I read this statement in a local paper. It was referring to a talk given by Earl Leonard, a former Coca Cola CEO to University of Georgia students. He was referring to the dim job prospects. He reminded the students that in 1860 the 40 students that graduated that year went off to fight in the Civil War, only 9 returned home.

I thought it was very insightful. Our time is now and it will be brief. Someone is always going to have it better than you and someone is always going to have it worse-so quit gripping and get on with living!

Perhaps Earl’s statement was extra meaningful to me because my brother died too young. I was changed by this experience. To me, “tomorrow” and “later” were no longer an option. I couldn’t keep deferring my life for whatever excuse I had made up. His death drove home that today is all I have. It caused me to ask every day since then, “Am I using my time wisely and to the best of my ability?”

I hope when you read this that you will pause for a moment and reflect on your life. Are you even aware of what you’d like to have accomplished by the end of it? Are you living it with intention? I find a good question every now and again can make a difference in a life. Carpe diem.